WHY THE FUCK…?! Clash of the Titans Remake

Want to hear Hagan bitch and whine about the Clash of the Titans Remake? Well now you can.

It was either this or an hour long Bonekickers type review…. which I’ll probly do sometime anyway… Fuck I’m sad.



  1. But what did you think of Persus’s hair? 🙂

    The more I hear about this movie the less I want to hear about it. Why does this NOT Clash of the Titans exist?

  2. “Why the fuck does Sam Worthington have a career?”- Something that has puzzled me for ages- he can’t act, he doesn’t do acton scenes particularly well, he has no personality other than his wavering accent. Speaking of which…

    Why the fuck does Persus’ accent keep changing all the time?

    and most importantly

    Why the fuck is this film getting a sequel (yes, sadly.)


    • he’s good in geoffrey wrights version of macbeth, at least check that one out

  3. WHY ThE FUCK…!? – – The new segment/show/category of Diamanda Hagan. I like it!

  4. “Why the fuck is bring the immortal woman who hates her immortality back to life a happy ending?” I was thinking the same thing when I first saw this movie. Wouldn’t it made more sense for Zeus to bring Persus’ family that was killed in the beginning back?

    Seeing this in the theater was one of the few times I nearly fell asleep watching the movie. Not the worst movie ever made but so uninteresting and unoriginal that it has no point existing.

  5. The entire third act of that shit could be summed up by Perseus shouting “Look at me, I’ve got a flying horse!” The fact that a movie that broken and schizophrenic can be made with that much acting talent and money baffles me.

  6. The answer is simple my dear scary evil overlord of doom Hagan… obviously the screenwriter and director never read their Greek mythology like good little kiddies. If they had they would see all the issues, plus the fact that some of the mortals time lines like Io and Perseus don’t match up.

    They would also know Medusa was Gorgon who was originally a mortal but she was cursed. The version varies either due to her being a virginal prietsess who was raped, vain princess who insulted a goddess, or a woman who’s goodness and beauty outweighted that of a vain goddess who cursed her out of spite.

    Io was a mortal who was a mistress of Zeus who Hera turned into a cow in a jelous rage then taken away and guarded by a monster with hundreds of eyes( on Hera’s orders). Io was later freed by I think Hermes (on Zeus’s orders) who told the monster such a borning story all his eyes closed….

    Also the woman in the box should be alive. She was in mythology. She was the whole reason her son was sent to fight Medusa so he was out of the way for the king of the island to force her to marry him.

    … you know what I give up. Just writing the corrections I started ranting about this too. >.<

    I may have to watch this movie just to write down all they got wrong and post it somewhere. As someone who loves Greek mythology this is too annoying for me to leave it alone.

    Also Zeaus didn't create Humans a Titan did, he also stole fire for them and as ounishment was chained to a rock for all eternity doomed to have his liver torn out and eaten my a vulture only to have
    it regrow over night.

    … I am going to stop now or I'll start giving a lecture on the subject

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