Diamanda Hagan Special Review- Child Bride

Hagan is Dead. But before she can come back to life she has some 1930s Exploitation to Review! Child Bride seems to be Public Domain.



  1. appalachian is hot hot hot… I will have that stuck in my head for the week now. I just read about ‘that scene’ on wikipedia and, yeah. Apparently they were able to get it passed the hayes code claiming this was educational.

  2. I apologize in advance for the longness of this comment:

    I’ve always was curious about this movie, since MST3K refused to do it for being “too disturbing” (I’m surprised it in public domain, why won’t someone want to have the honor of saying they own this film’s rights :P).

    Poor Hagan, can’t say the word “fuck”. That’ll teach her to be killed by a group of atheist, posses the bodies of other reviews and review 30s exploitation.

    Oh we crazy american with our pre-nazi nazi salutes (yes, I know the salute was inspired by the Romans.).

    As someone who goes to school in the american south our schools aren’t that different today as they were in the film. 😛 Only different is the buildings are made of brick and stone and not wood.

    The teacher’s boyfriend sound like he’s dubbed by John Carradine.

    The dubbing in the “eat your pussy” line from Stark Attack 3 was brilliant!

    This was funnier than the Freaks review but I have to admit Oan played a better Hagan. Apollo did a good job (when I first saw it was going to be him playing Hagan I had to stop myself from coming from the awesomeness. :P) but there was more Apollo than Hagan in the performance (but maybe that’s just because I’m more familiar with Apollo’s work than Oan’s). What I liked about Oan’s is he did a better job copying the voice and mannerism. Apollo was still funny though. Can’t wait to see who’s next to be Hagan and for her eventually return. 😀

    • I declare this reviews use of the shark attack 3 line to be the best. heh.

      Apollo did well, he chose to do less of an impersonation of me and thats cool. Thats what I expected when I was writing these reviews and Im fine with it. Number 3 does less of an impersonation than oan but more than apollo…

  3. I don’t think that I’ve ever been so disturbed by an internet review before. Well, more by the subject.

    I mean, really, did anyone know that the Nostalgia Chick is that old? Come on, that was totally her, you can tell by the hairstyle.

    • Excuse me, What are you talking about?

      • I’m attempting to derive humor from the observation that the titular Child Bride bears a very passing resemblance to Lindsay Ellis.

  4. Oh, I dont see it myself. Next posession review will be a lot less disturbing than freaks or child bride. theres songs!

    • *pony yay*
      Although I honestly wasn’t really disturbed by Freaks.

      Well, maybe a little by OanHagen.

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