Diamanda Hagan Reviews 04 01 The Knackery

Series 4 kicks off with Aleisters review of The Knackery! Northern Irelands second Zombie movie!



  1. Good review Mistress. Sad though that poor Aleister can never get anybody on the phone. The Stone Cold Steve Austin theme was a nice touch. And from what Aleisters saying, gotta say I’m glad I live in Chicago and not Northern Ireland. Hail Hagan!!

  2. Been too damned long, can’t wait for a proper Hagan instead of Aleister but I’ll gladly take what I can get. Also if you’d done this as Hagan it would have been almost a carbon copy of Battle of the Bone so good call.

    • too long? theres been 6 hagans, a twatty who, 5 urban gothics, an aleister and some flubs since the worst witch at the end of the december!

      i know the movie reviews are the thing people like most but iv hardly been away!

  3. Y’know, that guy’s Texas accent is atrocious, but it actually works as a Cajun accent at points.

  4. A rather unconventional start into the new series/season. But of course, unconventional is exactly what Hagan does best, as eminently evident here.
    I find it interesting that this was lit much more “regularly” than most Hagan reviews. Was that specifically an Aleister element?

    • yeah, i didnt fuck with the lighting because it was aleister. in fact in the original script when aleister was freaking out and trying to escape he even said ‘dont i even get the lighting?!’ but i forgot to say it during that bit.

      • I suppose that it will also help finally getting it into some people’s head the lighting is intentional.

  5. Heil Mistress! (I figured the German was more your style)

    First off, I have to say great review as always. Love your style, love your humor, love your everything.

    Second off, I wanted to bring a movie called Pot Zombies to your attention. I’m only posting it here because I wasn’t sure where else to send it. It’s DELIGHTFULLY bad (and yes, exactly what the title suggests)

    IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0466392/
    Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7OrmZqIO1M

  6. So much enthusiasm, so little thought. From my experience I can mentally piece together exactly how this movie fell apart. Hell, only recently I was cast in a zombie movie of similar (or lesser) competence. There was a lot of enthusiasm for the ideas and the sub-genre in general but it was one of the worst planned shoots I’ve ever witnessed. Filming took place on one of the few days in the year where there was carpeting snow making later re-shoots impossible, the crew didn’t think to bring extra batteries for the cameras or to even charge the ones they did bring fully and filming of the chase sequence was done in reverse order, starting at 2:00pm with an hour’s walk to the next location, so time will visibly be flowing backwards in the movie. More, they were clearly intending to use the sound they recorded on the day which is well and good until you realize that the movie is set long after the zombie apocalypse and you can still clearly hear cars (and in one shot a plane) going about their business in the background. The real kicker was that myself and others were constantly having to suggest that the director actually do multiple takes. It was clear our director wanted this movie to come out well, her enthusiasm was downright Woodian… it’s just her film-making was too.

    Still, I got to chase a father and daughter through the frozen woods half-naked and covered in blood, fall over a lot and get cannibalized so I can’t complain too much.

  7. this movie looks like a bad urban gothinc ep. wait… why does this movie reminds me of urban gothic so much?!

    i know they have like zero budget but, with more skill and better writting they could have done it better?

    anyway, here’s hoping there are better northern ireland zombie flicks. maybe done by more cappable hands. or maybe they get inspired and improve (this was done by the same people that done battle of the bone, right?)

  8. A good review and i love how it started off the new series with Aleister. I love that character (more the Chester if i’m being completely honest) and the phone bits and him playing with the cool plushies gave me quite a laugh.

    On a side note Mistress i had a dream about you once, it also had Phelous and Lupa in it. It mostly contained our combined evilness taking down the other Channel Awesome contributors in a big series of videos.

  9. Two things:

    1-I hated reality shows back in the 2000’s and I still hate them even on a meta-reality. But zombies are always an amendment.

    2-Suddenly my stomach craves for chicken and (cow) brains (tacos)

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