Best of 2012

A top ten of my fave moments in Hagan reviews in 2012.. and some non review moments. Im sorry for the rough final product, I was working against the clock to get this finished before I went to Omegas.



  1. The only thing I really didn’t like was the Harry Rouso review. That wasn’t because of you. There are just certain things that annoy the crap out of me to a point that with in a few minuets of it I get crabby and the clips from the movies just happen to be one of them. The character Harry just pisses me off. I find his constant shouting/ranting grating, and the near constant profanity tasteless. The entire thing just rubs me the wrong way and makes me want to throw all copies of the movie off an over pass to get run over by traffic rather than watch it. I believe you mentioned you enjoyed those movies. I just find myself unable to watch the clips for more than a few seconds with out it pissing me off in some way.

    Other than that I find your reviews very enjoyable. I only found out about internet reviewers in the last year via stumbling across Doug Walker on YouTube. I saw his crossover with you and was intrigued. Well more that what the ‘fuck is this’?!

    I got curious enough to watch your videos on the channel awesome site and you grew on me rather quickly. I especially enjoy the dark humor in your videos. Honestly in the span of a week you became my favorite over Doug.

    I wansn’t aware that the majority of the genre of movies you reviewed existed until I started watching. I mean who would really think that there was such a thing as a zombie chicken movie or even an audience for it. (And that movie pissed me off on how they portrayed southerners)

    Bascially what I am trying to say with out getting all gushy is your doing a great job and I enjoy your videos. I hope you have another great year. Not sure if you celebrate anything but happy holidays none the less.

  2. some off the top of my head:

    Black Beard’s Ghost – Good Ship Venus

    Chirpy – Patti Smith

    Sextette :the exact moment Alice Cooper dies inside.

    International Guerillas – Mexican drag queen ghost

    Chopping Mall – slow clap scene

    Zombeak – reaction to getting punched in the face

    Apocalypse 2 Revelation – “I built a fort!”

    Infamous Queer: Ben and Arthur: “I would have served Croissants!” (I don’t know why the idea of Hagan setting out pastry is hilarious to me, but it just is)

  3. Wonderful look back at a year of great work. I agree with many of the choices, but, in spite of my notoriously horrible memory, I think that I can add a few of my own, in no particular order…

    – The phone conversation with Boris Yeltzin from “Maniac Nurses Find Ecstasy”. There is so much that is brilliant about it. The sheer and utter randomness of it, the hilarious course the conversation takes (Especially “No, you were hunting bears naked. I was shooting at you”), the fact that it re-enforced the idea of Hagan as a powerful dictator in her own right… All that plus the fact that so much of it was improvised just makes it amazing.

    – The press release regarding “To Boldly Flee”. Here, you showed an amazing craftiness in getting something genuinely funny and entertaining out of a somewhat unfortunate situation. And it has “…and all tigers at sea, should such a thing be observed”, which remains one of my favorite lines.
    (And your cameo in the actual movie definitely deserves a mention, too, because, in my opinion, it is one of the genuinely funniest moments in the whole thing)

    – The Trolololol song in “Slaughtered Vomit Dolls”. Perfect use? Perfect use.

    – I definitely second skzip888’s pick from “Sextette”, because I’m utterly convinced that that is exactly what was going on. Also, in the same review, the best use of Ed Glaser ever.

    And now I’ll wander off to go about my business. I shall later let out a pained yelp when I remember something I should’ve mentioned, which is practically certain to happen.

  4. Thats why you shouldn’t believe people in the comments. They’re all full of shit.

  5. The Alice Cooper bit in Sextette is one of my favorite audio swaps, if not my favorite (there’s a lot of good ones).

    Regarding the batman theme audio swap, I think the reason why it didn’t resonate as well as you hoped/expected is because it’s a bit too on the nose. I can only speak for myself, but I find that good jokes always have an element of cross-eyed unexpectedness in them. Not saying random humor, but rather that even if it makes total sense in context, it has a lateral thinking aspect to it that takes the viewer/listener/reader by surprise.

    Given the fact that that movie was a Batman parody to begin with, using the actual batman theme(s) in there somewhere was an obvious thing to do, so no matter how well edited/synched it is, it still kinda feels ordinary. Contrast that with, say, the using the Power Rangers theme for the climactic fight in “Faust: Love of the Damned”. It’s a simple straight swap, with all the editing work of the Batman swap, but it’s IMO funnier because it smacked me in the face with a comparison which wouldn’t have occurred to me without it, but which was also so appropriate and accurate that it felt like it should’ve been obvious.

    Basically it’s a distinction between concept and delivery. Good delivery either amplifies the inherent humor of the concept, or twists the concept into something new and unexpected. In this case there’s no new angle to the concept: the delivery is more or less just a straight amp of the basic “it’s a Batman parody” premise. Which is just, well, a premise for jokes rather than a joke in itself, and already present throughout the movie/review.

    It’s similar with the “Land Before Time” jokes you were surprised by: people are used to taking the cartoon dinosaur logic at face value, so unexpected questions coupled with unexpected delivery is a double whammy. The same delivery being used to ask “why are these dinosaurs even talking?” wouldn’t have be funny, because that’s more directly inherent to the premise, but when coupled with the more surprising (and seemingly more reasonable by virtue of being more distanced from the premise) question of a dinosaur’s parentage, it becomes hilarious.

    Don’t take any of that the wrong way: you’re funny *a lot*, so this isn’t me trying to instruct you on how to be funny or any such arrogant bollox, I’m just offering maybe an outside perspective on why that particular joke didn’t hit as anticipated.

    • Goddammit, that’s the second time I’ve been tricked by these little text boxes into thinking I’m posting something much smaller than I actually am. That wasn’t meant to be such a bloody essay. OH LANGUAGE, WHY U SO INEFFICIENT?

      Maybe I should take up supervillainy. Apparently I’ve already got the monologing bit down, at least. 😛

  6. I love the moment in the Genderfellator where Editing Hagan and Voiceover Hagan join together to twist Reviewer Hagan’s words. It’s meta humour done perfectly!

  7. Greeting Diamanda Hagan.
    Two of my favorite moments that were not included were the Jem references in Eat the Schoolgirl and Nixon and Hogan Smoke Christmas. Though in the later’s case it did bring up an issue that has bothered me for some time. You never referred to Kimber as your sister. Were you to not really related? If so, was the deception a smokescreen to prevent the public from discovering your lesbianism, which would have not been conducive to The Hologram’s success? I also wonder about Eric’s role in all of this.

    • Ahhhh Im planning a bit where Kimber and Hagans sisterness is brought up in a tiny way.

      • I look forward to it. Also I meant Rio not Eric. I do have trouble with names sometimes.

  8. Worst bit of your reviews from 2012 was when my boyfriend almost punched me for bursting out laughing in his ear too many times when watching the Preaching To The Perverted review. It’s funny, when I first started watching your stuff a while ago I was NOT a fan after the first episode. Now, you are pretty much my all time favourite reviewer on the internet. Same thing happened with Oancitizen.

    Keep up the good work, and I’ll keep watching.

  9. Favorite episode of yours ever: Stonewall and Riot.

    I’ve watched that entirely too often!

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