Twatty New Who Review- Kill the Moon


The unrestrained Id of a fan is aimed at the worst episodes of Doctor Who, This time its ‘Kill the Moon’.

*Forgot to mention this issue: The moon egg was growing for millions of years but somehow was stable in mass for almost all of that time and then got 6 times heavier in less than 40 years?! (waitwaitwaitwaitwaitwaitwaitwaitwaitwaitwaitwaitGROW!)


  1. The whole ‘moon is an egg thing’ was the part of the episode I took the least amount of issue with. Doctor Who should be allowed to try whatever crazy ideas it wants as long as it manages to pull them off (cough *Pirate Planet* cough) but this episode… didn’t.

    Dear god that second half…

    • Who does have a history of doing batshit ideas like that (a moon egg is something I could see in the Pertwee era for instance) but Classic Who wouldnt have made it our moon. They’d have been sensible and stuck it on the other side of the cosmos, in a place where the locals dress like very flamboyantly.

      • The Pertwee era? The mostly earthbound Pertwee era? Maybe post Three Doctors but I can actually see a moon egg fitting in more comfortably in the Douglas Adams/Graham Williams season 18. Not highly regarded but I feel it was the shows most experimental (if not successful) period. Also, having Tom and Lalla act through a situation that outrages would be a joy to watch (The Horns of Nimon is a guilty pleasure of mine).

        And I just realised, in Big Finish’s The Reaping it’s revealed that the moon has been dug out and replaced with the Goggle Box history archives. Assuming this was the new moon you can safely assume that the new creature died. Does this make you feel better?

    • I choose Pertwee because his later era had a tendency to be silly but act like it was serious (which Kill the Moon has in spades). Does that make me feel better? A bit.

  2. Lundvik’s “so much for history” comment could be taken as meaning not that Courtney was making history with her “Wow. Wow! One small thing for a thing. One enormous thing for a thingy thing,” but that she was badly misquoting Neil Armstrong. Aside from that, however, everything you say about this terrible story is smack on the button.

  3. The episode was originally conceived as a Matt Smith episode – and it shows, as the Doctor takes Amy and Rory… I mean Clara and Courtney to the moon. The yo-yo fixation and the Doctor acting like a a hyper puppy is straight out of “Writing the 11th Doctor: A Guidebook by Steven Moffat” – at least if you ask me, even though the yo-yo being used to check the gravity is a callback to Tom Baker’s Doctor.

    The first half was written to intentionally evoke a mood of Hinchcliffe-era Who, so… yeah: All effect for a shoddy resolution. (Effect does not include PS2-era cutscenes of Space Shuttles, who’d need to be refuelled on their way to the moon, crash-landing on the moon.)

    By the way, in this timeline, the earth may very well be doomed due to the orbit shifting as a result of the mass changes of the moon. Just saying…

    • Ooooooooh, now I totally want to see a Doctor played by Tilda Swinton. I’m picturing that right now, and it is making me grin inside.

    • I doubt 11th would left his companions to be blasted by nuclear bomb unless they do the exact choise he expect them to do. That was too extreme even for 2nd or 7th.

  4. I bow before thee, Mistress, for squeezing some genuine entertainment value out of the episode that not even Capaldi’s performance could save. The rundown of all those things that were dumb and didn’t make sense is downright cathartic.

    Also, episodes like “Kill The Moon” happen when writers are way too self-assured about their cleverness.

  5. What’s with all that “Orient Express” nonsense? Episode doesn’t automatically become bad if it’s in new!who and it doesn’t become good if it has pointless evil clam padding for no reason.

    • Clam padding? Which episode are we talking about here?

      • I’m alluding to Genesis. Sure, it’s very good and classic and all but it has very obvious padding sequences.
        Most stories of classic era would win if you cut some unnecessary corridor shenanigans.

      • The clams are not padding. They are there to show that Davros had been experimenting on different life forms/ to provide a reason why that tunnel is no longer used and to also induce a bit of jeopardy.

    • If Orient was a Classic Who ep the other scientists (at least 1 or 2) woulda been actual characters instead of living set decoration, the deaths would have been more spread out allowing The Doctor time to use the information gathered from each persons death to work out whats going on. In the ep as is no-one but The Doctor does anything and he works it all out in the minute after he becomes the target. Te weaknesses are: The Doctor not using the evidence gathered by other peoples experiences, the lack of other scientists as characters, the length of the episode and The Doctor working it all out in a minute at the end. As the ep is, its hopelessly unbalanced. Pretty much everything before the minute where the Doc stares down the Mummy is pointless because The Doctor only uses what he sees to work it out and to me that is a big problem.

      • I dunno, my experience with Classic Who tells me having most of the scientist be set decoration is exactly what it would do.

  6. Wonderful episode!

  7. Yeah, I’m with you on the ultimate problem of the episode. Capaldi makes it bearable, but the entire conflict hinges on a question that is t nearly as…well, conflicting, as the writer clearly thinks it is.

    • Oh yeah most of the scientists in a Classic Who version would be but there’d also be 1 or 2 who actually do stuff (probably under The Doctors direction).

  8. So the Mexican miners didn’t have shuttles to go back?

    … Keep calling the giant space monster thing a “baby”, episode – I don’t think you made it obvious enough who you want me to agree with.

    • No, they didn’t.

      • Of course not. That wouldn’t have had the U.S flag, and we need that because the show’s popular on BBC America so they need to mention the States every few episodes now.

  9. I really like Capaldi a lot as the Doctor. He takes the role as more of an adult, unlike the previous incaranations, and he does look like he’s in physical shape to handle any situation on his own, even for someone who is known for being the second oldest actor to play as the Doctor. When it comes to how terrible the scripts are written, I always look to see if the characters themselves can be tolerable and entertaining enough for me to care. Peter Capaldi really works that magic for me.

    As for what you said about this season being the best season in New Who, I can’t really side with you on that. To me, season 8 is 1/3 good, 1/3 bad, and 1/3 okay/forgettable. I do like this season better than season 7, which was a huge pile of meh to me. Season 8 only had 4 good episodes, to my opinion. They were:

    Into the Dalek
    Time Heist
    Mummy on the Orient Express

    Some of you might be wondering “oh, but Javi. You left out Listen in the good category, which was by many considered to be one of Steven Moffat’s best episodes EVARRRR!!! I thought that you forgot about that one, so I’m reminding you about it right neooowwwww.”

    1. If you think that I like the current Moffat episodes, then you don’t know me very well.
    2. I don’t like Listen. I don’t think it’s a very good episode at all. It’s not scary, it’s not smart, and it’s not well directed or written either.

    Hold on a sec. Do I hear the Moffatites or the fans of Listen want to comment about how much they like that episode and thought it was great? Like I care. Okay, I sort of do, since I’m kind of tired of people praising it like as one of Steven Moffat’s best. I still think his best episodes were the pre-season 6 episodes and wishes he would at least try to redeem himself from his former glory, but most people that I talk to about the man doesn’t seem to see any of that, even though I mention that from time to time.

    Anyway, Listen is part of my worst episodes list of season 8, as well as Death in Heaven, Last Christmas, In the Forest of the Night (can’t wait for your review on that one), and this. Yeah, this was stupid from the very start. As for the abortion issue, I can care less if its on an animal. This episode, on the other hand, tried to push the topic as unsubtle as possible. That, and the girl in this one (even though I can’t remember her name, I don’t think was bad at all) was pretty pointless in this episode.

    • There were only three bad episodes in season eight. Robot of Sherwood, Kill the Moon and In the Forest of the Night. If you don’t agree then press this button.

      • I didn’t even attempt to push the button, only because I’m kind of afraid that I would feel very stupid for pushing it. IT LOOKS LIKE A PRANK, OKAY!>?!?!?!?!??!?!?! I do believe that both Kill the Moon and In the Forest of the Night were terrible. Robot of Sherwood, on the other hand, came close to being a bad episode for me. I thought it was just both okay and forgettable. Yeah, I do see why people didn’t like that one, but I can never bring myself to disliking it. I only saw 5 bad episodes in this season, I will forever stand by what I viewed were bad.

      • Is that because you are some kind of mad ideologue?

      • No. It’s just my opinion. I know people think I’m just too harsh and think that I’m trying to enforce my opinions, hoping that they will obey, and I will admit, I used to be like that. I just get carried away is all when I’m just being myself. Trust me, I can find worse things to wine and complain about than the New Who episodes.

      • How old are you?

  10. I love how the doctor forgets about Martha Jones and all the other women who were teleported up to the moon back in season three of new who.

  11. This episode almost seems like a different writer took it over for the ending. They spend the whole episode stacking the deck to make the ethics of it completely straightforward with only one possible answer, but then the heroes do the opposite of that for literally no reason with a character who’s main purpose is to point out how stupid this is. I can seriously see the intended ending being that this was the wrong choice, and someone made it right at the last minute without bothering to change the setup.

    • Considering that the New Who policy is encouraging the showrunner to meddle with all of the scripts and Moffat’s fixation on parenthood as a superpower, that theory really holds a lot of merit.

      • I don’t think this episode is bad because Moffat meddled with it, I think it’s bad because the writer made a poor job of writing it himself. This script is crap on every level, whether it’s the science, the characterisation, the plot logic, or the “moral” message. The most obvious situation is that the script came in, Moffat saw it was impossible to fix, there was no time to write a fresh script and so they just went with it.

  12. I can’t take this episode seriously. The moon being an egg is just so ridiculous. And exactly what was causing the gravity to increase, the moon increasing in mass (which is stupid)? No, because gravity isn’t affected by mass.

    This isn’t the first time Clara has taken the moral high ground at the expense of others. She did it in Day of the Doctor and it annoyed me then too

    • Adding to that, they claim that the tidal waves and stuff are the result of the increased gravitational pull of the moon on the Earth, fair enough (although I’ve outlined why that’s stupid in my initial comment) but what about the gravitational pull of the Earth on the moon, that thing that keeps the moon in orbit? If the moon’s mass was increasing the gravitational pull of the earth on the moon would increase, the moon would essentially fall out of orbit crash into the earth. (If you know science better than I do, feel free to correct me if I’m wrong but…)

      • Dream crabs. We don’t know how long the Doctor’s life has been a dream, whether it still is a dream or not, in indeed, if the Dream Crabs aren’t just also a part of the dream. As it stands, if Santa can turn up at the North Pole, then the moon can be an egg. When dreaming we often accept absurd notions.

  13. One more thing I would add to all of your points about voting with the lights: There is nothing stopping the governments or even just a bunch of guys working there from shutting down the power grids and thus overriding whatever the people would vote for. In fact, given how you see the lights going out in huge chunks, I would say this is what actually happened in the episode.

  14. Another criticism I would add to the whole voting with lights bit: There is nothing to stop people in the government or even just tech guys working on the power grid to shut down everything regardless of what individual people want. Given how we see the lights going out in huge chunks all at once, I would say that is what actually happened.

    • You can’t see city lights on Earth from the surface of the moon, even at night.

  15. Voting with lights isn’t as stupid as what predated it: setting a timer to the last second of Moon hatching while the tides are devastating the Earth. Each second of the explosion delay cost thousands of lifes. If my family was killed in the flood then watching this “beautiful creature soaring away” would make me want to go in space all right: to hunt it down and kill it yelling: “From the hell’s deep I spit at thee!”

  16. I like to think that the Doctor fried an egg for breakfast the next morning, just to mess with Clara. “Sunnyside up, Clara?”

    That thought alone just brings a smile to my face.

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